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far beyond driven

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what in god’s name did i do to deserve such an insane method of extermination?
i guess i must be blinded to my own bad, bad self. right now i feel so selfish and petty. i have nothing good to say.
gotta rise above it. people will never be there to help me until i do what i promised to do. so i will find the door….no  matter what.
if i disappear from existence at least i won’t have to feel like this again.
i am a freak. works for me. i am happy to be able…
and i thank you for all you do. i am truly happy to be at your service.
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